gossip girl 7 英文-第5章

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thought　she　looked　great　bald；　he　wasn't　about　to　say　anything。　

〃If　this　is　about　the　apartment…share；　I　will　be　calling　you　once　I've　reviewed　your　online　
application；〃　Vanessa　said　robotically　when　she　picked　up。　

〃Hey；　it's　me；　Dan；〃　Dan　responded　brightly。　〃What's　up？〃　

Vanessa　didn't　answer　right　away。　She　wanted　to　give　Dan　space　to　grow　and　blossom　into　the　
next　Kurt　Cobain　or　John　Keats　or　whatever　the　fuck　he　weanted　to　be；　but　breaking　up　with　her　
and　kicking　him　out　of　her　apartment　hadn't　been　exactly　been　easy　for　her。　The　casual　
lets…be…friends　tone　in　Dan's　voice　made　her　heart　feel　like　a　deflated　balloon。　

〃I'm　kind　of　busy　actually。〃　She　typed　a　bunch　of　nonsense　into　her　puter　to　make　it　sound　
like　she　was　drastically　preoccupied。　〃I　have　a　lot　of　applications　to　go　through…　for　the　new　
roommate…　you　know？〃　

〃Oh。〃　Dan　hadn't　been　aware　that　Vanessa　was　looking　for　a　roommate。　Then　again；　with　her　older　
sister　Ruby　gone　on　tour　with　her　band；　it　would　be　kind　of　lonely　and　boring　living　all　alone　in　
the　apartment；　especially　without　him　to　keep　her　pany。　

For　a　fleeting　moment　Dan　was　so　overe　with　regret　he　felt　like　grabbing　a　pen　and　writing　a　


tragic　breakup　poem　using　the　words　cut　or　shaved；　but　then　his　newly　shorn　neck　began　to　burn　
and　prickle；　and　he　remembered　why　he'd　called　Vanessa　in　the　first　place。　

〃I　just　had　a　quick　question。〃　He　took　several　quick　puffs　of　his　cigarette　and　then　absentmindedly　
dropped　it　into　a　vase　of　daisies　wilting　on　Jenny's　desk。　〃You　know　when　you　shave　your　head？　
Is　there　like；　a　certain　kind　of　razor　you　use？　Like　a　certain　blade？〃　

Vanessa's　first　impulse　was　to　warn　him　that　with　a　shaved　head　he'd　look　like　a　skinny　
seven…year…old　leukemia　patient　who'd　just　been　through　chemo；　but　she　was　tired　of　protecting　
him　from　his　own　mistakes；　especially　now　that　they　were　〃just　friends。〃　〃Wahl　blade　number　ten。　
Look；　I　gotta　go。〃　

Dan　picked　up　his　beard　trimmer。　It　was　from　CVS　and　didn't　have　a　blade　size。　Maybe　he'd　be　
better　going　to　a　barber。　〃Okay。　See　you　at　my　gig　tomorrow　night　though；　right？〃　

〃Maybe；〃　Vanessa　replied　breezily。　〃If　I　get　this　roommate　thing　figured　out。　Gotta　go。　'Bye！〃　

Dan　hung　up　and　picked　up　the　beard　trimmer　once　more。　〃Crack　me　like　an　egg！〃　he　shouted；　
holding　it　in　front　of　his　chin　like　a　microphone。　He　whipped　off　his　t…shirt　and　struck　out　his　pale；　
skinny　gut；　trying　to　look　saucily　bored　and　rebellious；　like　a　shorter；　thinner；　less…fucked…up　Jim　
Morrison。　〃Crack　me　like　an　egg！〃　he　wailed；　falling　on　his　knees。　

His　dad；　Rufus；　suddenly　appeared　in　the　doorway；　wearing　a　cigarette　burned　gray　Old　Navy　
sweatshirt　and　the　pink　terrycloth　headband　that　Jenny　used　to　keep　her　hair　back　hen　she　washed　
her　face。　〃Good　thing　your　sister's　too　busy　to　hang　out　with　us　after　school　anymore。　She　might　
not　be　too　thrilled　to　find　you　stripping　in　her　room；〃　he　mented。　

〃I'm　rehearsing。〃　Dan　rose　to　his　feet　with　as　much　dignity　as　he　could　muster。　〃Do　you　mind？〃　

〃Go　right　ahead。〃　Rufus　stood　in　the　doorway；　scratching　his　chest　fingering　the　unfiltered　Camel　
tucked　behind　his　left　ear。　He　was　a　work…at…home　single　dad；　the　editor　of　lesser…known　Beat　
poets　and　esoteric　writers　no　one　had　ever　heard　of。　〃I　think　if　you　put　the　emphasis　on　every　other　
word；　it　might　be　more　effective/〃　

Dan　cocked　his　head　and　handed　Rufus　the　beard　trimmer。　〃Show　me。〃　

Rufus　Grinned。　〃Okay　but　I'm　not　taking　my　shirt　off。〃　

Thank　the　Lord。　

He　held　the　beard　trimmer　away　from　his　face　as　if　worried　that　it　might　turn　on　by　itself　and　buzz　
off　his　famously　unkempt　beard。　〃Crack　Me　like　an　Egg！〃　he　howled；　his　brown　eyes　gleaming。　
He　handed　the　trimmer。　〃Try　it。〃　


Of　course　Dan's　dad　had　sounded　just　exactly　the　way　Dan　wanted　to　sound。　He　tossed　the　
trimmer　on　to　Jenny's　bed　and　pulled　his　shirt　back　on。　〃I　have　homework　to　do；〃　he　grumbled。　

Rufus　shrugged　his　shoulders。　〃Okay；　I'll　leave　you　alone。〃　He　winked　at　his　son。　〃Decide　where　
you　want　to　go　next　year　yet？〃　

〃No；〃　Dan　answered　hollowly；　then　shuffled　out　of　Jenny's　roomand　back　into　his　own。　His　dad　
was　so　gung…ho　about　the　whole　college　thing；　it　was　seriously　annoying。　

〃Columbia's　close！〃　Rufus　called　after　him。　〃You　could　live　at　home！〃　

As　if　he　hadn't　already　mentioned　that　a　thousand　times。　

Alone　in　his　room；　Dan　found　a　rubber　band　in　his　desk　drawer　and　tied　his　hair　up　into　a　stubbly　
ponytail；　leaving　the　shaved　part　exposed。　He　picked　up　the　beard　trimmer　again。　〃Crack　Me　like　
and　Egg！〃　he　whispered；　imitating　his　father　as　best　as　he　could。　He　grimaced。　There　just　wasn't　
ebough　gristle　in　his　voice　to　sound　convincing。　

Trading　the　trimmer　for　the　pile　of　college　catalogs　he'd　been　thumbing　through　for　the　past　three　
months；　he　flopped　don　on　his　bed。　Only　one　more　week　to　choose　between　NYU；　Brown；　Colby　
or　Evergreen。　He　flipped　to　a　picture　of　a　tweedy；　intellectual…looking　Brown　student；　his　back　
propped　against　the　trunk　of　agiant　elm　tree；　scribbling　away　in　a　notebook　like　a　young　Keats。　He　
looked　exactly　as　Dan　had　envisioned　he'd　look　himself　next　year…　before　he'd　been　discovered　by　
the　Raves　and　before　he'd　just　shaved　the　back　of　his　head。　

He　ran　his　finger　over　the　shaved　part　of　his　head　and　glanced　down　at　his　outfit。　He'd　have　to　go　
shopping；　because　none　of　his　clothes　went　with　his　hair　anymore。　

And　you　thought　that　was　something　only　girls　worry　about。　

If　only　Jenny　were　there　to　help　out；　Dan　thought　grimly。　But　his　little　sister　was　too　busy　being　a　
supermodel　to　go　through　his　closet　with　him　and　tell　him　what　was　lame　and　what　was　acceptable。　
Dan　picked　up　a　cup　of　Folgers　instant　coffee　that　had　been　cooling　on　the　floor　since　that　
morning　and　took　a　sip。　He　grimaced　at　his　reflection　in　the　mirror；　and　for　an　instant　he　could　
almost　envision　himself　up　on　stage；　giving　the　audience　the　same　annoyed；　pissed…off　grimace。　
Maybe；　just　maybe　he　could　pull　this　off；　without　his　sister's　help。　

Or　maybe　not。　


V　TAKES　THE　ROOM　OUT　OF　ROOMATE　

Fireeater：　I　keep　a　pretty　sick　schedule；　like　I　sleep　all　day　and　work　at　night　
Hairlessskat：　What　do　you　do？　

Fireeater：　duh；　I'm　a　performer　

Hairlessskat：　you　really　eat　fire？　

Fireeater：　I'm　working　on　it。　Mostly　I　dance　with　my　snakes。　

Hairlessskat：　snakes？　

Fireeater：　yea　I　have　four　snakes　

Fireeater：　you're　okay　with　pets　right？　

Fireeater：　you　still　there？　

Fireeater：　yo；　hello？　

〃Nice　try；　loser！〃　Vanessa　Abrams　logged　off　her　puter　and　went　over　to　her　closet；　She'd　
taken　off　her　hot　and　hideous　maroon　wool　Constance　Billard　School　winter　uniform…　the　only　
uniform　she　owned…　two　hours　ago　and　hadn't　bothered　to　change　into　anything　else。　Even　though　
the　girl　Vanessa　was　supposed　to　interview　in　three　minutes　had　sounded　cool　in　her　e…mail　that　
morning；　she　probably　wouldn't　be　psyched　if　Vanessa　greeted　her　at　the　door　in　her　black　cotton　
Hanes　underwear。　Vanessa　pulled　a　folded　pair　of　pants　off　the　top　shelf　in　her　bedroom　closet　
without　even　looking。　Everything　in　her　closet　was　black；　and　she　was　a　strong　believer　in　
shopping　in　duplicate。　If　you　owned　six　pairs　of　straight…legged　black　stretch　Levis；　you　never　
really　had　to　think　about　what　you　were　going　to　wear；　and　you　only　had　to　do　laundry　once　a　
week。　She　pulled　the　jeans　up　around　her　pale　and　slightly　pudgy　hips；　yanked　her　black　
long…sleeved　V…neck　tee　down　over　them　and　ran　her　hands　over　her　shaved；　dark　head。　She　might　
have　looked　odd　to　all　the　so…called　〃normal〃　girls　she　went　to　school　with；　but　the　girl　she　was　
about　to　meet　sounded　more　interesting　than　they　could　ever　hope　to　be…　well；　at　least　she　had　
online。　

The　downstairs　buzzer　rang；　just　as　she'd　anticipated。　Vanessa　went　over　to　the　window　and　pulled　


aside　the　curtain；　which　was　really　just　a　black　poly…blend　Martha　Stewart　Everyday　bed　sheet　she　
and　her　sister　Ruby　had　bought　at　K…mart　last　Halloween。　On　the　street　two　floors　below；　a　drunk　
homeless　guy　was　shouting　at　empty　parked　cars。　A　little　boy　with　green　spiked　hair　and　no　shirt　
on　sped　down　the　sidewalk　on　a　mountain　bike　that　was　way　too　big　for　him。　The　crumbling　
cement　block　that　served　as　Vanessa's　front　stoop　was　empty。　The　Prospective　roommate　was　
already　on　her　way　up。　

〃Please　be　normal；〃　Vanessa　murmured；　not　that　she　actually　like　normal　girls。　Normal　girls；　；　like　
the　girls　in　her　class　at　Constance；　wore　pink　lip　gloss　and　different　versions　of　the　exact　same　pair　
of　shoes　and　were　religious　about　things　like　highlights　and　pedicures。　In　her　e…mail　application　
this　girl　Beverly　had　said　she　was　an　art　student　at　Pratt；　so　she　was　older；　for　one　thing；　and　was　
probably　kind　of　alternative。　Hopefully　she'd　be　as　cool　as　she　sounded。　

Vanessa　opened　the　door　to　the　apartment　just　as　Beverly　mounted　the　top　of　the　stairs。　And　to　
Vanessa's　plete　surprise；　Beverly　wasn't　a　she；　she　was　a　he。　

Vanessa　had　sort　of　forgotten　to　specify　that　she　was　looking　for　a　girl　roommate　in　her　web　
posting。　

A　deliberate　mistake？　

〃Bet　you　thought　I　was　fema